Pefectly imperfect - The power of presence

This week, I attended "Meet the Teacher Day" with my daughter and spent ten days filling out paperwork. Okay, okay. Not ten days. Ten minutes really, but a lifetime when one's two-year-old has decided to make the classroom his own. Thank god for the husband running interference. Otherwise, my first impression on teacher day might not have been so sunshiny.

In fact, I was so distracted by just, well, everything, that I forgot to do one very important thing.

Volunteer.

You see, I had learned something from the interviews I had conducted for my topic this month. During August, I've been driving this blog down the road of imperfect parenting (it's a road I know well, unfortunately). As we all know, we don't get road maps, self-help manuals, or instruction booklets for those kiddos of ours. Sometimes it's hard to know if we're doing everything...or anything...right.

But when I talked to some local experts, I was surprised that some simple steps (although not necessarily always convenient in our busy lifestyles) are critical, while other things (like, you know, actual things) are less important to our children. And being a presence in your child's school life was something that was emphasized over and over again.

"Parents who volunteer have a better feel what their child's environment is like," says Cordell Ehrich, the principal at Cimarron Middle School in Edmond. It's easy to get involved, he adds, simply by stopping by the school office or emailing a student's teacher. And he stressed the importance of doing this at all stages - elementary through high school.

And opportunities abound not only for the parents who can come in during the day, but for parents who can't. Again, it usually includes you reaching out to the school to see what might fit.

"Kids want you there," says Ehrich. "They may not act like it, but they do."

In fact, kids seeing a relationship built between their teachers and parents creates respect, says Guidance Counselor Evan Tims at Edmond's Cross Timbers Elementary. Also, a parent's presence at a school shows students how much their parents care about them and their education, she asserts.

And no matter what, whether you volunteer or not, the importance of communication with your child's school cannot be stressed enough. "Generally, teachers and counselors check email daily, if not more often," says Tims, "so do make an effort to communicate with them." This too can lead to a better understanding of your child's world.

Remember, these days will come and go more quickly than you think. When I asked Edmond resident Michael Stranz, father of four grown children, if he could think of any time he wished he had been more involved, he mentioned he could never be involved enough in the day-to-day stuff. "I think as parents (of young children), we walk that line of being too over-bearing, but as they grow into young adults and we look back and reflect, those are the times we miss the most."

Words from the wise to the wise.

Check in next week for more on how you can connect to your child's world!

Time to start thinking...about summer (activities)

You did it! You made it through one of the most wintery winters we've had here in a while. It's time to start pulling out shorts, think about swim suits and vacations, and yes, consider how to keep those kiddos busy all summer long.


And with so many summer programs getting ready for "sign up" time, you've got to think hard and fast.


There's so much to choose from in Edmond, that I find myself a little dazed as I think about all the options. Sports? Music? Swimming pool memberships? Art camp?


Sigh. And to think my childhood summer breaks used to consist of a pile of books, two siblings, and a overactive imagination to keep me busy.


Well, guess what? You certainly don't have to overdo it. The best thing is to find that happy medium between keeping the minds and bodies of your kids active while still enjoying the laid-back pace of the season.


Pre-K and younger...If your kiddos are in daycare, chances are the program already has some fun summer activities up their sleeve! But if your kids are home with you, that doesn't mean they can't participate in some group fun, and at this age, working on social skills throughout the summer is definitely a benefit when preschool or Pre-K starts in the fall. There are several Mothers Day Out Programs offered during the summer (see list of MDO programs here), but if the cost or your summer schedule is prohibitive, just scheduling a weekly playgroup can do the trick.


As for other activities, programs for preschoolers abound. Places like Oklahoma Gold Gymnastics, Arctic Edge, Soccer City, The Fine Arts Institute of Edmond, and the YMCA offer many fun, affordable options. And don't forget this is a great time to get your child water safe. For a list of swimming programs, click here.


For more on this topic, check back April 10.


For elementary school kids...This is a time where your child can explore different sports and creative outlets, and taking advantage of summer programs that give children that opportunity can give them something to call their own. Maybe you've explored several different sports, and your child now knows what he or she does or doesn't like (often related to what that kiddo feels good at doing). Week-long camps are a great way to immerse a kid in an activity, and weekly, summer-long programs can contribute to long-term development. For a list of some local programs, check back April 17.


For the older crowd...A kid has often become specialized by this time, so choosing an activity can be easier. Music and sport camps are often offered through the school system, ones that you may know about long before the summer gets here.


But finding programs isn't the only thing a pre-teen or teenager can get involved in. In fact, the summer is a perfect time to begin discovering interests and building up experience through summer jobs and volunteering. Many churches will be running Vacation Bible School programs and will need teenagers to help, and other charities will be happy to have a volunteer. And if kids pick something near and dear to their heart, they'll gain valuable work experience as well as that buzz that comes from helping others. For more on this topic, check back April 24.


Finally, you don't have to spend big bucks to make the summer memorable for those kids. Places like the zoo, the science museum, and even just playing together as a family at a park can create a sense that the summer is a special time of year. Just be intentional about making a plan, and in their downtime, just let those kids be kids.